Friday, December 17, 2010

my dream, and sometimes I forget.

Sometimes I forget.

I forget what my passion is, what my why is, what my gift to the world is.  I don't mean forget as in I become, depressed, or sad, or lonely.  I just enjoy such small things that I forget about all of the projects I am creating to serve others.  I watch TV shows online.  I get wrapped up in reading facebook updates, or twitter.  I read friends blogs, I open links on all of these pages and read more about more people.  Time disappears and I am not working on my projects.  I have forgotten them.

Sometimes I forget.

I forget that reading twitter and facebook updates, watching TV shows online, opening links and reading more about more people inspires me.  I am learning.  I am seeing the world in views that are not entirely my own.  I forget that by doing all of those things or any of those things I am serving myself and others because I am allowing it to stir up thoughts, ideas, emotions within and those thoughts, ideas, emotions within are what guide the projects that I am creating.

Sometimes I forget that it can all serve the greater good, if I allow it to.  If I allow my diversions to serve me and not guilt me.   One of my favorite quotes is:
"The time you enjoy wasting, is not wasted time." - Bertrand Russell

Sometimes I forget.

Does this mean that I will now allow myself to spend all of my time in these diversions?  No, but for me it is a reminder to allow myself to be there.  If I am reading updates then I will allow myself to fully be there and not let an inner voice tell me I should be somewhere else.  If I am allowing myself to watch a TV episode online, then I will allow myself to fully enjoy it and be moved by it (I get seriously emotionally pulled in and I love that) and not be telling myself it is wrong to be watching TV.

Sometimes I forget that I forget that life is meant to be lived.  Sometimes I forget that I am allowed to simply be in it and enjoy it, that I don't need to be working towards my dreams at all times.  My dream is to inspire everyone to fully live their life and love their life right now, right where the are. 

Sometimes I forget that I do that just in living mine, that my dream is not actually work, it is my life.
Sometimes I forget that in living each day and loving each day that I am working towards my dreams, that I am living my dreams.  I already am my dreams.  Sometimes I forget that everything that I could ever desire, I already am.

Sometimes I forget that I get to choose where I am and that does not just apply to my physical location or any other status, it refers to where I am with myself.  If I am choosing to work on my project right now, then that is where I am.  If I am choosing to soak up inspiration via social media, TV, and more than I will fully choose it and this will allow myself more space to fully be present for my passion.

Sometimes I forget that my passion, my why, my gift to the world is in action with every breath I take, with every thought that comes up, with each and every moment spent here or there.

Who I am is not how I show up when I know everyone is watching.  Who I am is how I show up when I think no one, even myself is watching.

1 comment:

  1. I can so relate to this! Sometimes I find myself spending hours on the net reading various things and finding out about different people. Sometimes it is related to my higher purpose, and sometimes it is not.

    I too feel that I procrastinate on projects that fullfill my dreams and get me on purpose, by perusing the net. I sometimes get very hard on myself and make my self stop 'wasting time' and tell myself to 'be more productive' Often this is what I need to do, but other times I feel like I am being too serrious about life.

    I think it can be difficult to find the balance between doing unproductive things because they make you happy, and ensuring you a putting your energy in to tasks that fulfill your purpose. I am still working on that balance too!

    Thanks for a very insightful post x