Well, tour happened!
When I am in it, I am in it. And, I was in it. Did I have intentions to make more regular entries to my website? yes. Did I plan to shoot a ton of video? Yes. Did I actually create time and space for those things once I landed on the road? NOPE. Oh well! I apologize for not fulfilling those wishes of mine, whether you expected them or not.
It turned out to be a little test tour for me, as well as Jason (Mraz). He was out testing new songs for the next album, and I unknowingly was testing out how to balance the job I created for him and the brand I am creating for myself which includes supplying my website with constant content of inspiration, health, and more.
I hadn’t planned on returning to tour. When I really got into creating my site (after returning home from tour with Colbie Caillat) my creativity was and still is exploding as to how I can reach the vastness of who we all are. How can I be of service to all in sharing my passion? I have created services of a wide variety and I am constantly thinking of more, but tour? I had forgotten about tour!
Tour is home to me. No matter how many times I say I am ready to be in one place, when I arrive on the road it is the most natural thing in the world to me. No matter how different each year is, no matter how different the personnel is, no matter who the artist is, touring is my most normal state I have come to find out.
All of last year I kept telling myself and others that I thought it would be my last tour, I didn’t know what I else I would do, but I was no longer attached to being on tour. I no longer wanted it to define me. I took time off to be in one place, to create, to explore what I wanted to be. Once I was able to see that I did not have to be defined by being on the road that I was just as happy in one place, it opened me back up to it. Not because I needed it, or craved it, but because I knew that I had something to share, that my service and I are valuable to the road. I wasn’t doing it because it was all that I knew, but because I wanted to offer my service and be of service.
I was so surprised to find new excitement for being on tour and with a new client (with Colbie), and a whole new group of people. I immersed myself in it and frankly didn’t want to go home when the tour ended. But it did end and I did go home where I was then inspired to finally get my website going and to not put myself back on the tour market until after it was up. I got so immersed in my new creation and services that I forgot that the tour world existed, until I was called back into it.
Once again, I was surprised to how easily I settled back into being on tour, but during the length of the tour I made a point to be clear that I was not sure if I will want to be touring past these dates. I have big plans for myself as YOUR JOYOLOGIST! I have so much to offer, so many possibilities of how to be spread my message, and I didn’t see how touring could fit into that.
As tour went along, I did start to open myself up to the possibility of touring again next year. It is home, I do love it, but is it too comfortable? Will I be giving up on all of the other things that I want to create? Is touring too easy for me? When these thoughts come up, I remind myself that I do not have to make a choice right now in this moment. I don’t even know if touring next year is a definite option, that world is highly subject to change.
It is all possible. I am now back home and back pursuing all of my many ideas. I am putting myself into the world in many ways. I am back to regularly updating my website. I am keeping myself open and available for touring, but I am not avidly pursuing it. If touring next year does happen I will commit to being connected to both that world and this new one I am working to create. It is entirely possible to be in both worlds at once, I just have to stay committed to both and create the time and space while I am on the road.
I am working whole-heartedly for it all. I am open. I am of service. I am listening to myself. I am one with myself and all that surrounds me.
And above all, I am grateful!!!!!! What a life! What a freaking, life!