My walls are still bare. Once again, I am living in a space that I have not decorated at all. Is this my resistance to settle? I do want things on my walls, I do. I don't know how. I was withholding from spending any money, so I want to blame my bare walls on that, but I bet even if I had money to spend my walls would still be bare. I am so used to having collapsible plans. Do you want to see how fast it will take me to pack up all of my belongings and move out? I bet I can do it an hour. Two hours would be more accommodating, but I bet I can do it in one.
When I go to other people’s homes, my mouth drops in awe of how much of a home they have made for themselves. They have personalized their space. It is cozy and full. I have a 325 sq ft studio that is quite empty. Its not that I just want things to make it look full, but I do want it to be mine. I want it to be more than an extended stay lay-over hotel room.
Maybe, I just don’t know what that looks like? Maybe I am so used to floating and morphing and transforming that I have no idea what Tricia’s space looks like. I keep going back to money. Well, if I just had a fat checking account, I would go crazy. This place would be styled out! But, really, would it?
I do have ideas now. I want to get pillows and make a little sitting corner. I bought a desk and a table and chair set, but I most often end up sitting on my bed or making a picnic on the carpet. I planned to make a little alter when I moved in and I did, but it turned into my nightstand and is mostly a place where I place my water and tea when I am in bed. I want to move my stones and personal pieces to somewhere that I can sit in front of.
I am doing it tomorrow. I am going to change my space. I don’t know anything about feng shui, but I am going to do my own version of it tomorrow. I want to put things on the walls. Really, I do. I will keep my eye out for whatever calls to me (within a budget of course). I want to make this mine. I don’t know how long it will be mine, but that doesn’t mean that I cannot make it mine for now, right now. Cause that is what I got. I got now.